Unconditional Love

Dear Daughters,

The past several months have been wrought with changes, good and bad, and events that will shape you and your future. From graduations to new schools to the loss of your grandfather, you have been met with joys and sorrows, forced to make decisions and changes, and been led to greater awareness and understanding about yourselves and the world around you. And what a world it is. 

You live in a very different world than I did when I was your age. While we had many of the same social issues, you have far more challenges to deal with–from the constant barrage of social media to mass shootings. Sometimes I wonder how you deal with it all. And then I remember that sometimes you don’t. According to the 2018 Culture and Youth Studies Group, your generation, in the United States alone, comprises 25% of the total population. The number one killer of your generation is the automobile, and most of these deaths are due to drinking and driving, Suicide is the third leading cause of death of your demographic. Perhaps, in part, because one in five students is bullied in school, and between 20 and 25% of students have been cyber-bullied. Students today are exposed to just under eleven hours of media exposure every single day. And that’s only the beginning.

I can’t even imagine growing up with the same pressures you all face. It’s no wonder 34% of all 19-28 year-olds use drugs, and 52% of 12-28 year-olds regularly drink alcohol. And as a parent, I feel helpless to do anything about that or any of the above statistics. Utterly helpless. And that’s what leads me to this.

I’m not sure that any of you fully know or even vaguely recognize the agony that your parents go through every time one of you walks out the door. We can teach, lecture, advise, etc, but we can’t control your thoughts or actions nor those of your peers. And that’s really scary! You have no idea what it’s like to hug you, tell you we love you, wish you the best, and then hold our breath as the door closes behind you, anxious about every phone call, every text, every breaking news report. 

Each day, you are faced with a new challenge, a new set of decisions, a new obstacle or fast-track to becoming the human beings you are going to become. Every day, you have to decide what you are going to do, who you are going to be, where you are heading in life. It’s a daunting task! And all I can do is hold my breath and pray. I’ve come to learn that it doesn’t matter what kind of family you come from, what you’ve been taught by your parents, or what you’ve witnessed over the course of your short lifetime this far. All that matters is what you decide is the right decision for you at each moment in time. 

So, I remind you today how much your father and I love you all, how much we trust you to make the right decisions throughout your life, and most importantly how much we will love you even if those decisions are not the ones we hope you will make. As Dr. Seuss told us, “You’ll get mixed up, of course, as you already know. You’ll get mixed up with many strange birds as you go.” But still, we will pray and hope and love you unconditionally. Isaiah asks us in today’s reading, “Can a mother forget her infant, be without tenderness for the child of her womb?” And the answer, on my part, is no. No matter what happens in this world, so filled with darkness and despair, know, my daughters, that my love will never change, never falter, never grow weary. In fact, I love you all more each and every day.

Are you looking for a new way to meditate on the Stations of the Cross this Lent? If so, check out the newly revised edition of Stations of the Cross Meditations for Moms. You can order it in print or download the ebook version today!

What I was writing about this time last year:  The 9 Most Important Things I’ve Learned at 47

Amy Schisler is an award winning author of both children’s books and sweet, faith-filled romance novels for readers of all ages. She lives with her husband and three daughters on the Eastern Shore of Maryland. Her books, Picture Me, Whispering Vines,  and Island of Miracles are all recipients of Illumination Awards, placing them among the top inspirational fiction books of 2015, 2016, and 2017. Whispering Vines was awarded the 2017 LYRA Award for the best romance of 2016.  Island of Miracles has outsold all of Amy’s other books worldwide and ranked as high as 600 on Amazon. Her latest children’s book, The Greatest Gift, is now available; and her novel, Summer’s Squall, can be found online and in stores.

You may follow Amy on Facebook at http://facebook.com/amyschislerauthor, Twitter @AmySchislerAuth, Goodreads at https://www.goodreads.com/amyschislerand at http://amyschislerauthor.com.

Amy’s books: Crabbing With Granddad (2013), A Place to Call Home (2014), Picture Me (2015), Whispering Vines (2016), Island of Miracles (2017), Stations of the Cross Meditations for Moms (2017), The Greatest Gift (2017), Summer’s Squall (2017)